Today seems an opportune moment to resuscitate a vital movement for the future not only of Britain, but I would submit, that of the entire world. I should like to make a humble submission: that when Queen Elizabeth II eventually passes on, we should replace her with a watermelon. No one can deny that Elizabeth has made a generally excellent job of being Queen, but I can’t help feeling that the peculiar requirements of the role could be equally well fulfilled by a watermelon. Yes, yes, … [Read more...]
The Diamond Jubilee…and why Britain’s next King should be a Watermelon
June 6, 2012 by 1 Comment
Take down the bunting, put away the flags, Britain's brief holiday from the grim realities of the 21st century into its royal fantasy is done for another year. For the second year running, the country has come to a standstill to celebrate its strange anachronism of a monarchy, and everyone is congratulating themselves on how marvellously we do these things. But I should like to make a humble submission: that when Queen Elizabeth II eventually passes on, we should replace her with a … [Read more...]
Diamond Jubilee…like a wet weekend in Southend
June 5, 2012 by Leave a Comment
So, that was the Jubilee then. A strange time to be back in London, the streets hung with bunting dripping in the rain, Union flags hanging limp, the skies grey, pictures of the Queen everywhere, the air cold and damp. Just across from where I live, the local pub was festooned with red, white and blue balloons, and there was a lifesize cardboard cut-out of the queen with drizzle running down it. The fish-and-chip shop next door was busy. At one point, some one called for three cheers for the … [Read more...]
